nine

9:48PM
March 10, 2010

Sometimes I ask myself why I have to go through all of these problems…. Sometimes I don’t even understand why I am being given these problems….

I want to believe that He only gives us the trials that we can handle, that He knows the capacity of our own heart and that He is planning something bigger and better in store for us in the future. But at times like this, when I have nothing, I have no one, what else am I supposed to think? Who else am I supposed to hold on to?

I want to count my blessings. I really do. I have been trying to do just that. But my loneliness and hopelessness doesn’t go away. Sometimes I feel like my sanity’s finally reached its limit. That I am on the brink of insanity. But I hold on. I can still see the light at the end of the tunnel….

But when will this end? For how long will I be tested? I can only take so much. Please dear God….